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Yeah I know I suck at titles, don’t care. Today, I thought about my death, and I didn’t freak out. No panic! attack. Just a calm decidedly simple thought, that it’s ok. This journey of mine has taken me through some crazy self-introspections, some really dark avenues, and brought me around full circle to just ok. I mean, who really wants to die? An old friend of mine would always talk to me about their thoughts, and how they really weren’t afraid, or just discuss death in general.

Anyway, I’m getting to a point where I’m not just functioning, but moving past this. This being everything from my brother to drinking. I’ve cut back probably 90% of all my alcohol consumption, saving it for simple things like I used to. I will have some beer on a weekend day, or like the other day, I had a really long day. Kids played sports all day and I was exhausted, but happy they had played hard. So I drank one. Just one beer, with dinner. And I was ok with it. Drank some soda after, and although I craved another, I simply told myself, I didn’t need it.

So I’m slowly working my way past all this. Can’t thank my friends and family enough. The friends thing is still a touchy subject, but. I’ll get past it too. Anyway, wanted to post an update since I’ve been super busy and extremely tired recently.

If you’re reading this, thank you for following. If not, internet void (and fuck you spam comment bots), I bid you good night.

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